Shake it baby!

This week I was craving another one of my old favourites from my mom's home cooking. Breaded pork chops in Shake n Bake.

Ok, it's chicken and not pork.

But their southern accent is simply adorable.

I don't know why, but I never really cook pork. Even though I love it. Especially breaded. My mom used to do breaded pork chops sometimes for dinner with Shake n Bake. As a side she would either make some quick Alfredo noodles or vegetables au gratin and mashed potatoes. Since I don't eat enough vegetables, I decided to do the latter.

This is a pretty simple meal to make, but it takes a long time to prepare of you don't have proper tools. For example, I have a small kitchen with small pots. So, I had to cook my vegetables and potatoes in two batches because I could only fit half of them at a time. Also, if you want to save time, buy the frozen vegetables California mix which has cauliflower, broccoli and carrots. You can also use instant mashed potatoes, but I always prefer the real thing. (Instant mashed potatoes feel like it sticks in my guts like plaster.) This is also a great complete dinner if you want to feel a family and a couple of guests. You should have enough food for everyone.

So here's how I did it.

Ingredients:

• 1 kg (~2.lbs) of pork chops
• 1 envelope of Shake n Bake mix for pork
• 1 bag of California mix frozen vegetables
• 1 envelope of Bechamel sauce mix
• 2 cups of milk
• 1 tsp nutmeg
• 1 bag of shredded cheddar and mozzarella cheese
• 4 potatoes
• 2 tbsp of butter
• 1 tsp onion powder
• salt + pepper

Directions:

The first thing I always start with is to wash and prepare the vegetables. In this case, I just need to wash the potatoes.

Of course, I wouldn't be able to do it without good ol' Spudmeister here.

Then peel and cut them into large cubes. This will make them easier to boil.

Put the diced potatoes in a large pot and fill with water until you get about an inch of water above the potatoes. Turn on the heat to high and boil them until they start to become soft.

On the side, steam your veggies until half cooked. They should still be a little hard when you poke them with a fork when they're done.

When your potatoes are done, drain the water and set them aside in a large bowl. Add the butter, onion powder and salt and pepper to taste. Then start mashing!

For the vegetables, put them in a Corningware or glass baking dish.

Now make that Bechamel sauce as indicated on the envelope. All you should have to do is heat up the milk in a saucepan and add the mix and whisk it until it becomes thick and creamy.

When the sauce is ready, pour it on the veggies. Add nutmeg, salt and pepper and mix.

Finally, cover the whole thing with the cheese.

Heat up your oven at 350 degrees Fahrenheit and stick it in there and let it bake until the cheese starts to turn golden on the top. Then take it out and set aside to cool down a bit.

Now for the pork. Cover a large metal baking sheet with aluminum paper and grease it up a little with some cooking spray or a bit of oil, margarine or butter. Next, open up that package of pork and sort of clean up the pork chop with some cold water. To do this, don't rinse the meat under the water. Instead, simply pass your hand in running water and wipe it all over the meat. This should remove any pieces of bone stuck on the meat and also help the Shake n Bake stick better.

Pour the breading mix in one of those little plastic bags it comes in, then put a pork chop in there and shake.

Champion Jack Dupree says "Shake baby shake!"

Do this for every pork chop and you should have just enough for 6 chops or about 1kg or 2lbs. Then lay those chops on the baking sheet and bake at 400 degrees Fahrenheit  for exactly 20 minutes.

When the timer's up, take them out and let them cool down a bit and you should be ready to serve.

Since I make that food for my lunches at work, I managed to take a picture of my lunch in all it's glory in the fanciest workplace china money can buy!

My coworkers are so jealous of my food.

They see me eatin', they hatin'.

This made quite a hearty meal, and it made a lot of food too! I should have enough to last me all week and then some. I'll probably have to invite a friend over for dinner to be able to get rid of it all. Who's hungry?

When I made this I was so out of it. I was very distraught and so many things went wrong. First, when I was making the Béchamel sauce, I wasn't paying attention and the milk burnt at the bottom of the saucepan. It took me forever to scrub that out later. Then, when I was putting all the ingredients in the dish, I put the cheese over before adding the spices. So I had to remove all the cheese which, by the time I realize my mistake, had started to melt over the hot vegetables and sauce. And when I finally added the spices, I unscrewed the cap on the nutmeg container instead of just lifting the little plastic flap to use it as a shaker and when I turned it over, almost half the nutmeg fell in the vegetables. I had to scoop it all out and there was still a lot left. So, it ended up tasting a bit more nutmeggish than anticipated. It was still good though. The rest turned out fine. I mean, it's pretty hard to screw up mashed potatoes or shaking meat in a bag. This just goes to show that things don't always go well when I cook. In fact I can be a little clumsy. I also have a hard time doing multiple things at the same time. Anyway, I'm really glad this is over with and that I finally have food for my lunches!

Mama's home made BBQ chicken

Hello dear readers! You know, whenever I make a chicken recipe I always just cook some chicken breasts and that's it. I never actually cooked a whole chicken. The reason behind it is that I thought it might be too messy and it would be too much of a chore to disinfect the entire kitchen after I'm done, you know, to prevent salmonella from getting all over the place, take over then kick me out of my apartment. (Salmonella is such a scumbag.) Yet, I felt like I would never be an accomplished cook if I never actually cooked an entire chicken. Where would I start? So, I did what every young bachelor male does in a case like this and I called my mom to get her advice.

My mother is the best cook I know. Yeah, okay, everybody says that about their mom. But, they haven't tasted my mom's food, that's why. 'Cause then, they would see how much my mom's food is so much better. My mother has always been a good cook. She was a hard worker (and still is - too much for her own good actually) and all while working all day long and taking care of my sister and I in the evenings and weekends, she had to come up with some quick, easy and delicious meals. Most of the time, she would do what I do right now and make a huge meal in the weekend and we would have that for dinner all week. My dad wasn't much of a cook. He would sometime make dinner when she was too busy, but it never turned out as good. (Sorry dad.) But in his defence  he does help a lot around the kitchen though. And his mashed potatoes are the best. He's also a terrific baker and his desserts are awesome.

One thing that has always stuck around in my memories of living at home is how every Sunday - EVERY Sunday - my mom would make chicken. I remember at some point even getting sick of having chicken every Sunday. It was good! But, at some point I couldn't have it anymore. Well, I'll tell you what, ever since I left the family nest, I have never missed her chicken so much in my life. Nowadays, whenever she invites me for dinner on Sunday to have some chicken, even though I have chores and things to do in preparation for the upcoming week, I can't help it and I just drop everything to go have dinner at home.

You know, living solo and having to take care of myself and cook for myself made me realize not only how good I had it at home, but also how hard my parents have worked to take care of my sister and I and make sure that we were well fed. I wasn't always an angel and I know at times I was a little prick who took their hard work for granted. But, since I left home I fully realized how amazing my parents have been and I can't find any words to express all the gratitude I have for what they have done. I love them so, so much.

Anyway, enough with the memories and emotions. The reason I'm writing this post is because my mom gave me her roasted BBQ chicken recipe, and I'm about to share it with you, you lucky sons of bitches! You're going to see that it's pretty easy and if you do it, you'll see how amazingly delicious it is. So here we go.

Ingredients:

• 1 large chicken (with some of the fat trimmed off)
• kosher salt
• 1 large or 2 small garlic cloves
• St-Hubert BBQ seasoning (probably only found in Quebec. St-Hubert is a chicken rotisserie chain. Kind of like Swiss Chalet, but a thousand times better.)
• Montreal Chicken seasoning
• PiriPiri seasoning
• Onion powder
• Sage
• Savory
• Salt + pepper
• Olive oil
• Bovril chicken stock concertrate
• Some water
• 1 bag of mixed baby potatoes, cut in half
• or 4-6 yellow potatoes, quartered
• 1 large sweet potato, cubed
• 1 small bag of baby carrots
• A bit of thick cotton string.
• 1 can of St-Hubert BBQ sauce. Only in Quebec. I swear it's the best sauce ever. I could drink a glass full if it wasn't so bad for my health.

Directions:

First, take care of the potatoes. Clean up the sweet potato with a brush under cold water, peel it and and cut it into large cubes.

Then quickly rinse the small baby potatoes in cold water, cut out any roots that may have grown and cut the potatoes in half.

Then open up the bag of baby carrots and add them to the mix.

Drizzle some olive oil on top of the vegetables, and sprinkle some sage, savory, onion powder, salt and pepper. Enough so that when you mix the vegetables they will all get covered by the oil and the herbs. Then set aside.

Peel the garlic cloves and set them aside.

Now for the messy part. First, preheat your over at 350F. Then, put the chicken on a large cutting board and with the help of a knife, remove any excess fat. Mostly around the legs and the butt of the chicken. Then, inside the chicken, sprinkle about a teaspoon of kosher salt and make sure it covers the entire interior of the chicken. You may want to roll the chicken so the salt goes all over the place and sticks all over the inside. Then, put the chicken on its back and add the cloves of garlic inside.

Now, transfer the chicken into the roasting pan. Sprinkle the St-Hubert BBQ seasoning, the Montreal chicken seasoning and the Piripiri seasoning on the chicken. If there are any spots without spices, just put some in your hands and rub it where you need to. Rub the entire surface of the chicken with enough seasoning so that the chicken is red. Then tie the legs together with the string.

Now, add the vegetables in the roasting pan all around the chicken. Drizzle a little bit of the chicken stock concentrate on the vegetables. Not a lot! Just dizzle a few drops all round. Maybe about a teaspoon or two. Then add a little bit of water over the vegetables, just enough so that the bottom of the pan is covered. Probably no more than a cup.

Pop this bird in the oven, set the timer for 2 hours, and wait. After 2 hours, it should be done. The vegetables should be just a little tender. If you think it needs more cooking, add it for another 30 min. But, keep an eye on it. You don't want it to get dry. Mine was perfect and super juicy after 2 hours.

Look at that delicious white meat! It was soooo juicy and tender. And the spices on the skin made this really tasty and flavourful crust. Oh man! I was preparing my lunch for the next day and I could barely restrain myself from eating the whole thing because of how delicious it was.

I felt more accomplished as a cook now that I have cooked my first whole chicken. The next step will be to take the carcass when I'm done with it and make some soup! Maybe this weekend? Find out soon!

Thanks for the recipe, mom! I love you.

The Italian Sub

This week I didn't know what to make for my lunches. I lost my appetite a bit over some stress lately and I just didn't feel like making anything, I was grocery shopping just to pick up the basic things - milk, orange juice, cereal, eggs, etc. Then, while walking by the meat section, I saw a freezer full of meat sliced especially for Chinese fondue and I thought "Hmm, that would be good in a sandwich." Then it hit me. It's almost exactly the same as what they use in Italian subs at some of the greasy spoons around town such as George le Roi du Sous-Marin (which means George the king of the sub in case you didn't notice). The thought of those deliciously oily savoury meaty sandwiches had me convinced, I was eating Italian subs for my lunches this week. Also, they're simple and super easy to make when you don't really feel like cooking much. So here's what you need.

Ingredients:

• Submarine sandwich bread
• Chinese fondue style thin beef slices
• Genoa salami
• Mozarella cheese slices
• 1 green bell pepper
• 1/2 large sweet or spanish onion
• chopped lettuce (preferably iceberg, but I had romaine. Whatever!)
• olive oil
• Italian herbs

If you want you can add some sliced tomatoes and mushrooms in there as well, especially if SOME of you HATE peppers. (^_-)-☆ Also, spicy marinated eggplants are delicious in there. But, I wanted to keep it simple. Besides, in my personal opinion, the tomatoes and marinated eggplants make the bread all wet and soggy and that grosses me out. Wet bread? Pfft! Get outta here!

Directions:

First, you have to cut your vegetables. Don't chop them finely or in cubes because they will be falling out of your sandwiches and get all over the place. Slice them in long strips instead. If using tomatoes, slice them and cut the slices in half.

Dang! Had I bought tomatoes, I could've done the Italian flag!

The next step is to fry those veggies in oil and make sure they get all soft and caramelized. Heat a large pan on medium-low heat and add about a tablespoon of olive oil. Then throw in the green peppers and fry until soft, then set aside.

Repeat the process with the onions until they become golden and transparent.

Next comes the meat. Before you cook it, I just want to warn you that because the slices are very thin, they cook very VERY quickly. So, keep the pan on medium-low heat and lay the slices down in the pan and flip them as soon as one side is cooked  and put aside.

Do the same for the Genoa salami, but here's another warning. Because salami is very fat, your pan might smoke a bit. Be sure your fan is turned on above your stove. If you don't have one, open a window and blow the smoke out with a fan or something.

Once everything is cooked you should have a nice plate with all the necessary ingredients to make your sandwiches.

Now, preheat your over to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. If you have a small toaster over, use that. It's even better! In the meantime, prepare yourself a sandwich with the slices of beef, salami, onions and peppers. (And tomatoes if you're using them.) Sprinkle some Italian herbs on top and add some cheese. Don't put the lettuce yet.

Pop that in the oven until the bread is toasted and the cheese is all melted. When it comes out, add the lettuce and a drizzle of olive oil and balsamic vinegar or whatever dressing you'd like. And there you have a most tasty Italian sub. Quiznos, eat your fucking heart out.

¡Arroz a la mexicana! (Fancy Spanish for Mexican rice)

¡Holà señors y señoritas! This week I have been feeling exceptionally lazy. Mostly because I had a bit of a hangover after a little farewell party that my landlord organized for my neighbours. (Yeah, she's awesome like that.) Also, the weather is deathly cold outside. It's so cold that all humidity has been frozen right out of the air into snow and ice. The moment you open the door and take your first breath, it feels as if your lungs are about to collapse and you get in a fit of coughing for a few seconds. Then you get used to it. I think in lazy cold times like these, there's only one thing to do. Mexican rice. I made mine a little extra spicy to bring on the heat. It may be muy frío outside, but I'm gonna make it muy caliente.

Mexican rice is super easy to make. Especially the lazy way. You get a pound of ground beef, an onion,a green pepper, some taco beef seasoning, rice and oil. You chop and cook the onions and green peppers until the onions are transparent. Add the beef and cook it a little and add the seasoning with water and let that cook for a while until it thickens. Then cook some rice. When the rice is cooked add a can of tomato paste, mix the beef in with it and add a whole jar of salsa. BOOM! Mexican rice. But, lemme show you in pictures. I didn't almost burn my dinner taking these for nothing. Plus, you'll get a little surprise.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to take 

a picture like this by yourself with a timer on 

a cell phone with no stand?

Ingredients:

• 1 lb of ground beef
• 1 jar (650 ml) of mild or medium salsa.
• 3 tbs grape seed oil
• 1 small can of tomato paste
• 1 1/2 cup of Uncle Ben's converted rice
• 1 green bell pepper
• 1/2 spanish onion (or 1 regular onion)
• 1 packet of taco mix
• 1/2 tsp chili pepper flakes
• 1/2 tsp chili powder
• 1/2 tsp cayenne pepper (ay ay ay!)
• 1 tsp cumin
• salt + pepper to taste

Directions:

First, we need to chop our vegetables up.

Then, in a large pan, add 1 tsp of oil and cook the onions and green peppers until the onions are transparent.

Then add the beef and cook until almost completely browned.

At that point, add the taco seasoning mix with a cup of water and add the other spices in there as well if you want it more spicy. Don't add them if you want to keep it mild. And let simmer until it has thicken to a good enough consistency.

That's good enough.

Now, it's time for the rice. Of course, if you're a real pro and want to save time, or if you actually have a stove large enough, you can do this wile cooking the beef. First, pour about 2 tbs of oil in a large pit and stir in the rice. (1.5 cups) Then put on medium to high heat and stir the rice and oil until you hear it pop a little. 

Now, add 3 cups of water. WARNING: Be careful when adding the water. Water reacts with hot oil and might splash everywhere. Be sure to pour the water completely as to prevent this from happening. Then let the rice cook; it should take up all the water.

When the rice is cooked, reduce the heat to low and stir in the tomato paste. Empty the whole can in there and mix it until the rice gets all red.

After that, add the meat and the salsa, then stir to mix it all together.

Add some extra seasoning to taste with the cayenne pepper, red chili, etc.

And that's it! Es muy fácil! Now, let's eat!